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My son Sasha was diagnosed with “autism spectrum disorder” at 3 years. Then we were recommended to give it to an ordinary kindergarten – to the society, to the children, so that he gradually came into contact with them. But this, unfortunately, did not happen – he ignored the children. After 2 months we took him from the kindergarten. When my son was 3,5 years old, I met a well-known Moscow specialist Anastasia Vladimirovna MATVIEVSKAYA and her father, the author of the method Vladimir Yakovlevich MATVIEVSKY.

After that, for 3 years we went to them to the Moscow center, in spring and autumn they lived there for 2-3 months, passing a set of classes to exit this state. The emphasis was on the relationship between the child and mother. The technique is based on the fact that only mother can solve the problem: she needs to reconstruct the way of life, the way of thinking her and the child, the order of the lessons with the child, so that the environment in which the child is located becomes for him a healthy and decisive autistic state. The main work there was conducted with the parents, it is believed that just classes with the child will be useless. Then, several Almaty families with the same problem who also went to Moscow for classes, united and rented a house at their own expense – we continued to study there. At that time, the project had no name, now it is known as “Autism We Will Win”, and the activist parents united in the Association of Parents of Autistic Children (A series of materials http://zoj.kz/ on this topic was published in the Health Expert in 2016. – Author’s Note).

When Sasha was 6 years old, we ran into the border in the development of speech. Thanks to Matvievsky’s work, he became an obedient, executive, contact boy, he was considered a leader for his level of development, he was pronounced. “Brought” – a term that indicates that the child is in contact with the outside world, in contact with people, and not in himself, in his morbid state. Thus, the behavioral issue was resolved. But speech … He did not understand her, did not speak for himself. Braced in this impasse, I began to look for and study different methods and options for development. Soon I came to understand that besides the medication treatment with nootropic drugs we need classical speech therapy (by the way, the strongest in the world since Soviet times). In Sasha, the autism spectrum was formed against the background of organic damage to the central nervous system, because of the same lesion there were speech difficulties. We found a specialist who worked with him on auditory attention and perception (basic in the development of speech), the development of pronunciation, replenishment of vocabulary, the development of logic, thinking and fine motor skills. The first successes of my son in speech activity showed that I chose the right path of development. However, not all of the speech therapists we met were conscientious: it happened that they transferred the classes, could not establish contact with the child, included articulation exercises on the laptop from YouTube – in this case specialists had to part. I met two wonderful teachers who perfectly knew the art of working with a child – a privately practiced speech therapist Natalia Vasilyevna BROSENSKY and the head of the association of speech therapists-defectologists Almaty Sonia Irshatovna SHUNAEVA. But there was one “but”: their services with the intensity of training as much as required by Sasha, we could not afford. I realized that if we do not have a speech to 6 years, then 2-3 lessons a week for us as a drop in the ocean.

In 2012, I myself went to a speech therapist, my son gave me the basic practice. I have read and studied a lot, but now I have approached this question thoroughly. Sonia Irshatovna offered me the idea to disaccustom herself. She noticed that the child responded to me much more, he listened to me better than I did. At first we agreed that she would give assignments, and I would fulfill them with Sasha. It turns out that my son chose me a new profession. My experience and success is all of him. Without exaggeration, I can say that we worked from morning till night. In everyday life, we said everything we did – dress, brush our teeth, take a spoon, each movement step by step. This is a very laborious work, not only that for 45 minutes he came to a speech therapist, “a”, “y”, “and” did with tongue. Each set of exercises done a day 3-5 times. Since then, I have also completed courses on psychomotor correction and neuropsychology.

The luck for us was that we found a music teacher – a unique teacher Galina Vitalievna Makarova came to work with her son with all her heart. Thanks to her efforts, Sasha developed a voice, breathing, articulation, auditory attention. Now he can already play the simple children’s songs with the piano by both hands and sing! In every lesson we rejoice in Sasha’s success in singing, he began to sing (and speak accordingly) much purer (louder and clearer), it became better to intone … We try to hold regular concerts at which children share successes with relatives and friends.

Seeing my son’s successes, the mothers of other autistic children began treating me as a specialist. According to them, they face the same thing: experts either do not undertake to work with them, or do it formally – according to the scheme, without an individual approach. In private at home or at their home, I worked with children for 3 years. Then came the understanding that we need to build our own platform, our own center for rendering these services – and there are many who need it, and there will be a place where to invite eminent experts to study with them.

The first invited experts were representatives of the Polish sensory integration center KLEKS (Warsaw) Robert and Agnieszka Lemanski. Agnieszka Lemanska – teacher, speech therapist, sensory integration therapist, collaborates with universities, conducts didactic classes for students. We chose them for three reasons. First, they have been practicing sensory integration for 15 years. Sensory integration is the processing of feelings coming from sensory organs, their structuring and ordering of the information thus obtained for the subsequent adequate response. Symptoms of autism often include difficulties in processing sensory information, such as touch, sounds, smells, taste, brightness and movement. These difficulties can make everyday situations unbearable. Secondly, in their work they use a non-directive approach in the classroom, that is, the game. A child with autism in the first place can not play, contact with peers, and communicate. And with the help of the game it is much easier to bring the child into contact. Third, and perhaps most importantly, they are very open, good-natured, conscientious people. I have long understood that the attitude of a specialist to a child is almost the most important in working with children in addition to knowledge and experience. The first time they visited Almaty in October 2016, after spending a 12-day training module. Invite them the second time we plan in May 2017.

We scrupulously chose a room for the center “Ray of Light”. To him there were quite a few requirements: a total area of ​​at least 200 squares, rooms without columns of at least 40 squares, large windows, lots of light. We were specifically not looking in the center, because in the residential area prices are cheaper, plus 80% of families live close by. As a result, we created a center similar to Kleks with our own hands – swings, beams, equipment, toys, weighted blankets and so on repeated. Problems were with everything: to order from abroad is expensive, in Kazakhstan there is nothing ready, so they made everything to order. Classes in our center cost 4000 tenge for an academic hour (3000 tenge for a lesson per month), which is lower than average prices for a market: a body-oriented therapy session for Almaty specialists costs at least 5000 tenge per hour, speech therapist services – 1500-8000 Tenge per hour.

The second most important task of our center in addition to working with children is the training of specialists. There will be qualified specialists – there will be successes in children! After all, even the best sensor room is nothing without a specialist who will teach the child in it. We regularly hold seminars of the country’s leading psychoneurologist, doctor of psychological sciences, professor Raushan Bedalievna KARIMOVA. For very many specialists, the knowledge of neurobiology and psychophysiology that it gives was a great discovery. In addition, Raushan Beydaliyevna helps many parents of our center and regularly conducts consultations on the development of children. She treats every child with great attention and always tries to give recommendations based not only on medical treatment. We have several experienced employees, but we are always interested in new employees. Since there are very few literate specialists working with children in the autism spectrum in our city (and in the country as a whole), we set one of the main tasks of our center’s work to prepare tutors (social workers) who will accompany the child with autism in the way of life and Help him. Especially valuable for us will be men – boys among autists the vast majority (world statistics say that out of 8 children diagnosed with 7 boys – Autorep.), And they should learn from men: there is another hormonal background, and other behavioral patterns. We choose employees in the center, looking at the attitude to their work, to their children, to their parents, to the problem we are facing. The specialist should have the research ability to every time in the lessons with the children to push the child forward, “to the exit.” is he should have such qualities of character as patience, cheerfulness, the ability to play and bring the child into direct contact.

I noticed that my child has a problem, at 3 years, but the diagnosis of “autism” was put to him only at 5 years. At first the doctors did not see anything – he went to the contact and could work according to the instructions, they told me: “Mom, you think you’re making up.” But with the age of strangeness in behavior, more manifested themselves, more qualified specialists, and we were diagnosed with “atypical autism”.

On the picture of classic autism, this is not quite similar, someone from the experts even suspected schizophrenia. In Aliaskar, speech problems are minor, because of mental retardation, his situation is much worse with contact and emotions. At the age of 5 we got to the Association of Parents of Autistic Children in Almaty, where they were taught according to the methods of Vladimir Yakovlevich MATVIEVSKY. Then we went to Moscow for master classes of parents of children with autism. We had good results, the son learned a lot. I am very glad that the specialists from the project “Autism We Will Win” were our first teachers. Now for me it does not matter what son’s diagnosis, I see problems and try to solve them. It is important for me that a child can build contact, be able to behave in society, find his place in life. We compare the skills of a healthy child and one’s own, we teach him what he does not know how.

The last 4 years, we with Leila BAYRAMOVA are holding each other, united our efforts. Once we dreamed that we would come to each other’s houses, drink tea and watch our children play different games themselves. After all, if normative children play with each other easily and naturally, it is difficult for our children. We thought: let them have some special features, most importantly, that they perceive each other. To date, we have achieved this, we have a lot of such happy episodes. I understand that this is all thanks to us, parents – we literally taught them to be friends, with the help of games they taught them to interact with each other. However, there is a minus: when you are for the child and mother, and father, and teacher, and speech therapist, then at some point you get lost for him like a mother.

We were not taken anywhere: because of intellectual violations, we were long refused in ordinary schools, in sports sections, in circles. We with great difficulty found the capoeira coach (Brazilian national martial art, combining elements of dance, acrobatics, games) to the boys. We were important sports component, coordination of movements and the example of men for boys. We would be happy with any sport where we would be taken, but we are happy that this sport has become an exotic martial art. With the professional trainer, the president of the Association of Capoeira in Kazakhstan Rustam Balabayev our children in the mini group are engaged three times a week for 1.5 years. They have a dramatic change. Rustam prepares them without discounts for diagnoses, they feel the attitude, and they have a desire to engage in. For him it is also very valuable!

Now, Aliaskar visits school every day. 1-2 lessons with him individually for a special program are engaged in good teachers. I’m glad that they could find a common language with the son, try to develop it in every possible way and are very indifferent to his problem. However, such a scheme does not imply socialization. It offends me that ordinary children are given the opportunity to fully study, and with the specifics in development – no. This is unfair, the state saves on the development of such children. Many such children are very resourceful, many of them can be reached to the lower limit of the norm if they are dealt with on a daily basis. I do not believe in the inclusion program in the form in which it are presented here. It is very difficult to get into the project of inclusion in our country. I am impressed by the experience of Italy, where the state allocates a tutor – a personal assistant to the mother for the child’s education.

Officially, the correction-development center for sensory integration “Ray of Light” was opened last fall, but in fact we have been working for 2-3 years. We wrote the project for a long time, gathered, planned – in the yard, at home, in the park. We realized that our center is needed (despite the fact that there are specialists in Almaty in general), when they realized that not all methods of work are suitable for all children with Autism. In our center, we use the method of sensory integration, psychomotor correction, classes in speech therapy and defectology, as well as group classes in game therapy and art therapy (music classes and other areas of creative development). Now we are applying for a grant from akimat of Almaty. Its award will allow us to equip our center and organize training seminars for specialists. We hope that in future either the akimat or private sponsors will help us with the premises: rent is a significant part of our budget. We hope for the support of the state, because for today our incomes are enough only for renting premises and salaries for specialists, we are not talking about buying additional equipment for our own money.

Sensory integration is based on the regulation of three systems, which are laid down in utero: vestibular, tactile, proprioceptive (self-perception of oneself and the boundaries of one’s own body). If to explain briefly, then to effectively teach a child with autism, it is enough to put him on a swing, in a hammock. The effectiveness of any mental processes multiply increases: the child quickly memorizes verses, repeats better after the speech therapist, he finds it easier in the mind. In addition to the developmental function, the jump in intellectual development, the effect of the exercises can be seen in everyday life: children begin to feel the boundaries of their body, stop striking about all the jambs and corners, they lose stereotypes (obsessive movements, attempts to switch the child from which cause hysteria), in general Behavior improves. I will cite as an example a girl diagnosed with autism: when she came, she had minimal eye contact, a small set of words, now she is much better at contacting, speech activity began. There are also ordinary children, which will be useful for such stimulation of the vestibular apparatus. You probably saw children in schools who are spinning, spinning, spinning – they are so stimulating their vestibular system. I later asked: these children have problems with mathematics, attention, memory. Some of my acquaintances now lead us to the lessons of a normative child with such problems – he has improved performance and behavior.

We all take pictures with children on video, for a few years a large video archive has accumulated. For us and parents it is an opportunity to track the child’s successes. We are in close contact with the parents of children involved with us: we give advice, support, share our experience. The child is very important when the family participates in his successes – without his support, he can not cope. Plus this is peace for the parents. The higher the level of nervousness in parents, in particular with mom, the more twisted the child. Amina and I were trained at the Parent University at the Brant Homeopathic Center. Parent University is based on the teachings and experience of the founder of Brant Marina Zamsharifovna TARGAKOVA and the author of the method of humane pedagogy, teacher and psychologist of the world name Shalva Alexandrovich AMONASHVILI. In the near future, we plan to organize Saturday meetings to support parents, in which Marina Zamsharifovna’s students will conduct lectures on the topics of building child-parent relations, the upbringing and education of children, and the spiritual development of children and parents. After all, an unhappy man can hardly raise his child happy! It is important for us to show our parents, that to develop the intellectual, physical and social sphere of a child’s life is good, but not enough. The importance of the spiritual sphere is very great!

There is a mistaken belief that all autistics are geniuses and clever men, all future Bill Gates. This stereotype appeared after a number of Hollywood films: “The Man of the Rain”, “Forest Gump”, “Reckoning.” To our great regret, this is far from the case. With an easy degree of autism, children really look like normative, they can adapt to normal life in full. But with severe forms of autism, concomitant diagnoses include mental retardation, speech disorders such as dysarthria, motor alalia. If you want to see a truthful film about autism spectrum disorders, then I recommend the Chinese ribbon “Ocean Paradise” in 2010. It tells about a 16-year-old guy with autism and his father, who has a month to live. This month he will devote training the son to vital skills: how to prepare food, ride a bus, wash floors, etc. Unfortunately, many autists by 15-30 years remain dependent in everyday life, for them, everything is still done by moms and dads. Leila and I dream of creating a place for autistic children, where they could realize themselves. For our children, we dream of buying a house in the village with a garden, a vegetable garden, so that they themselves all grow and sell. First, they can themselves provide this way. Secondly, physical work has a healing effect. In general, autistics are recommended to master a particular craft in order to live life when their parents become weak or go away. We are actively searching for highlights, abilities of children that can be developed: my Aliaskar skates well, and Leila’s son Sasha simply loves to cook, the best way is for him to make pancakes and salads. Our main task is to allow the child to do what he likes and what works best!